prayer shawls and sex toys

I just had an interesting scenario placed in my mind...

A friend of mine was telling me about a dilemma that has come into existence at her husband's congregation.  As it turns out,  there is a small group of women from a small church in Minnesota that meet together to make small talk and prayer shawls.  The majority of these women are rather conservative in their views and are also in the later years of their lives, although there are a few who are younger in age (in their thirties) or newer to the christian sub-culture.

(disclaimer: I have never been invited to a prayer shawl meeting and am only speculating on what it might have been like to be in this setting. I apologize in advance for any misinformation that might be presented in my attempt to describe such a gathering)

My initial thoughts when it comes to "prayer shawl meeting" are of tea and some sort of phyiscal representation of the word "pleasant"  so... here we go...

As the prayer shawl meeting began and the nice christian women made themselves comfortable while possibly enjoying some type of warm beverage, they likely began thinking of pleasant things to discuss or readied themselves to listen to other delightful pieces of information that the other nice ladies in the room were going to share.  The meeting was going splendidly as Gertrude mentioned the nice tea cookies that Lilith had made.  Conversation and prayer shawling eventually lead to a fun discussion of pleasant and nice current events.

when all of this was interrupted unexpectedly....

...and by something that was so foreign and perceived as un-pleasant.

You see, one of the young women who was newer to the group had been trying to come up with a way of making extra income to provide some more financial stability for her family. Her pursuit had lead her to a solution.

sex toys.

She could sell sex toys the same way that some people sell can-cutting knives or plastic storage containers that burp.

I imagine that there was quite a change in atmosphere after this foreign concept entered the room and "dirtied" the ears of the pleasant christian ladies...

Anyhow, the meeting eventually carried on and ended.  Later that night the husband of the prayer shawl gathering leader ended up hearing about the "incident" and calling the head pastor, asking if he could meet for breakfast the following morning.  Breakfast was had, a story was told, a story was retold, and now that story is being written...

This leaves the pastor in a predicament that he will have to, through discernment, sort out...

On the one hand, he does not want to offend or drive away the shawl ladies who were so thrown off by the "incident".. on the other hand, he does not want to offend or drive away the young lady who brought up her entrepreneurial endeavor... and his view is that the topic in and of itself is not necessarily a black and white one.

Anyhow, I am glad it isn't me that has to sort through this mess....   there are some lessons I learn about it though.

Sex toys and prayer shawls aside, one aspect of what we have here is a cross-cultural misunderstanding.

On one side, we have a group of christians with a very conservative mindset who have likely been a part of this church subculture for many.. many.. many years.

On one side, we have the newer christian who is not as familiar with the cultural norms of the older ladies, and also likely has a different perspective on sex and what is culturally appropriate to discuss in a prayer shawl gathering.

Neither group was prepared to handle the situation that they found themselves in...

One side was unprepared to discuss something that was out of their comfort zone, and the other side was unaware that such a topic would be seen as out of place or offensive to the other side.

I think that this is seen in a much inflated degree and has bigger implications as it reaches different spheres of cultures and subcultures.

I think it boils down to this...

The more willing we are to communicate on cultural and social issues in ways that are clear and respectful, the less we will be startled by a cultural curve-ball in an otherwise t-ball focused sub-culture.

I think many christians are prepared to regurgitate answers to common questions within the church... it is like t-ball... you know where the ball is, it isn't going to move, it isn't going to change, all you have to do is hit it and that is good enough.. you don't even need to hit it hard.. just, bump it forward...

.. but then all of a sudden some kid shows up who doesn't play t-ball and throws a fast ball, or a curve ball, or a knuckle puck, or a toaster.... and if we would have done our research, we would have known how to handle these things coming at us.. but all along we were way too focused on just playing t-ball... the fact is that culture will continue to change and develop.

It is the job of the church to continue to look at the culture around it and communicate the Gospel through words and actions in a ways that can be understood... let's face it... we now live in a world of prayer shawls and sex toys and if we don't start paying attention we are going to get blasted in the face by a toaster.


Peace.

crapping the bed

 Story

Years ago, when I was in high school, I was a member of one of the school choirs.

One of the perks of being a member of the choir was the amazing adventure that was commonly referred to as "choir tour".  I remember that I cared very little about what we sang or when we sang it, but thought a lot about how much fun it would be to spend a week or so with a bunch of classmates as we took a tour bus on an amazing journey.

Our destination that year was Colorado.

Being a snowboarder and living a the land of 10,000 lakes but ZERO mountains... the Colorado thing sounded like a pretty good deal.

And it was... I had a lot of fun with the other students, we had a day at the mountain, we sang in some lovely places, and I am sure had some very pleasant memories made.... but none of those memories immediately come to mind for me when I think back to the trip.

...as a matter of fact, my immediate connection with what would have been a whimsical and light-hearted-song-filled adventure is something completely different...

you see, I got really sick.

No..... you don't understand.... I got really... really sick.

The worst part of it happened over the course of a full day, where I threw up over 25 times (I think when it comes to vomiting... numbers mean nothing after 15.. you just stop counting, but I was fortunate enough to have others keep a running tally for me ) ...and this wasn't counting the times where my body struggled to push my torn-up-barbed-wire-filled intestines through my dry-as-cotton mouth... and failed, over, and over, and over... but not without leaving my mangled and helpless body sprawled out next to the porcelain thrones in any number of public bathrooms... yes, dry heaves are what I speak of.

In the midst of this fantastic display of semi-digested projectile was what should have been an incredibly embarrassing moment for me if it wasn't so pathetic... though at the time, I think it was a balance of the two.

As my body fought to remove whatever illness was plaguing me between my marathon of vomit spells, I woke up in the middle of the night... freezing cold, sweat drenched, and lying in a watery lukewarm puddle of my own feces.

Awful.

Fortunately there were some loving chaperons along for the tour, who did a fantastic job of caring for me and helping me to get cleaned up while maintaining for me some sense of dignity... I still wonder what happened to those sheets though...

So, I got cleaned up... threw up a bunch more... eventually recovered before the tour ended, and I made it back home in one piece.

That whole terrible mess is what I think of when the choir tour comes to mind... it was not good... but it was memorable. 


Application

Well... I suppose  a lot could be taken from this.. and I am not quite sure what to focus on.

We could tie it to how if we focus on the negative aspects of life it can take away from the positive pieces and the beauty of the adventure we are on...

We could talk about how important it is to go through a process of removing filth (sin ) from our lives, even if it leaves us tired, beat up, embarrassed, and weak.. because it is not until the mess is out of us and out in the open that we can truly begin to clean ourselves and recover.

We could talk about the need to persevere in the midst of trials and circumstances and the beauty that comes in the form of fellowship when we allow others to help us and expose our vulnerability in a loving environment.

But, instead, I think i will just mention those things briefly and allow for you to draw your own connection and application from this story...

thorns and blue birds

I have written two posts this past week but not published either of them yet...

I am not sure why.. I think they are interesting enough and all that jazz... I am not too worried about their content... but maybe there is just going to be a better time for them to be published.... I really am not sure why I have not posted them.  I will though.  At some point.

Anyway... That lead me to write this post, which currently exists for the sole purpose of letting you (whoever you are) know that I have still been writing, just not publishing.  I am sure that all you momentum addicts out there have been going into withdrawal... so hopefully this will give you enough of a taste to get you through the cold sweats.

I am torn to write about either things that are either light hearted and simple to comment on.. or things that are quite deep.  The conflict comes because my mind has been circling around the latter, but I know it would be much more relaxing to write on the former.

I think that there are many times in our lives that we are forced to make similar decisions... we have to chose between the more difficult and emotionally consuming route, or the one that we could skip along without a care in the world.  The thing is... they very rarely will lead you to the same place.. they might lead you toward the same place, but they often times will bring you to a different destination, insight, conclusion, revelation... what have you.

When we come to these forks it is wise to assess what it is you should do... sometimes the sun stained path with flowers and blue birds is where you should frolic... At other times you need to enter into the dark crimson thorn filled wilderness and fight for every small step you struggle to take.

I think a serious problem comes when we don't take time to choose our path wisely.  If we only take the simple path we will likely not grow or develop into the dynamic person we could become... and if we only fight through the thorns, we will eventually become so wounded and bitter that the potential growth that we could have benefited from is never realized and our mangled body will likely die in the wilderness.  We need a balance.  We need discernement.

We also need community, but I am not going to elaborate on that in this post.

So.. let us examine the challenges before us and walk them out appropriately, in wisdom and with the support of others.

death and life: I see flowers

Winter is beginning to die.

This seems to happen at least once a year in Minnesota... There is this season that is both beautifully serene but unforgivably brutal, but if you can survive Winter in Minnesota, you will feel as though you have just escaped death itself... but just barely.  As the snow melts away and you begin to see the signs of beauty and new life that accompany Spring and there is an actual internal transformation that parallels this changing of seasons.  Joy and hope begin to sprout inside of the Minnesotan survivors.. as snow changes from sleet to rain.. and temperatures creep to above freezing.

I used to dislike spring.. and it still might be my least favorite season... though winter is a beast...  but I have learned to appreciate spring greatly.. although it is only after experiencing  a bitter winter that I can truly say I appreciate this season of new life.

I have spent many years in Minnesota and have learned a lot about life by the distinct changing of seasons that exists in this wonderful state.  We honestly have every season as it was intended to be... nothing is held back when it comes to Minnesota seasons.

I think our lives also have seasons, though they are, more often than not, based on situations rather than time.

A funny thing occurs when your season of life mirrors an actual season... I think that a deep understanding can be developed by studying what occurs in nature and drawing connections to what occurs in life. flowers beginning to bloom, grass becoming green again, dirt being washed away.. etc.

I don't really feel like going into details about my life season right now other than I had been in a winter for what seemed like about 2 years, and I am ok being a little vague for the time being... but looking back over the past few months I will say this with a smile and a seed of hope that has taken root.

My winter has been in the process of dying and my spring is on the horizon.

starve my pride: thoughts on fasting

  
This was an intended response to a post on fasting by Jon Acuff on Stuff Christians Like. Due to a network error I was unable to post this on his site, so I thought I'd put it on momentum and send him a link.


SCL Article Link
 
#722: Telling someone they shouldn't tell you about their fast.


Response:


There was a season that I felt called to a rhythm of  fasting...

This lasted for several months and consisted of one day each week where I would only drink water.  It was paired with some other times of intentionally focusing on God, and much good stuff came out of it, but something came out of it that I did not expect.  Due to the nature of this ongoing weekly interruption, and the fact that at the time I had an extremely busy social calender, which often times meant going out to eat or at minimum drinking some good beer... It was inevitable that over time this would be something that caught my friends attention. 

... and it did.

What resulted was a great series of conversations about the spiritual discipline of fasting.. reasons for it, ways to do it, biblical examples of it.. etc. etc.  What made this even more interesting was that it was a completely new topic for some of my friends.  So anyhow, a while after that season had passed and fasting was nowhere in my mind because quite a bit of time had gone on.. I met up with some of my friends.. which, as I sad earlier.. often times means food and drink.  as we were enjoying the night I noticed that one of my friends didn't order, when I asked if she wasn't hungry, she responded "This is one of the days I am fasting".. which made me smile and think for a second. 

I think that we are intentionally living our lives to honor God, there will be things that happen that impact the lives of others around us.  If these are things that bring glory to God, it would be a shame for them to be hidden or not addressed for some false sense of  "spiritual preservation" or "humility".  If the reason you don't share you are fasting is to appear humble.. guess what.. that is pride.  Your focus has gone straight to yourself, which is the same thing that is addressed when scripture says not to draw attention to your appearance when you fast.. so you have simply slapped a different coat of paint to the same core issue... 

... which is attention being directed to man rather than God.

If God chooses to use your gifts, practices, or life to draw attention back to Himself so he receives Glory, we shouldn't be stopping this because of our own pride or our fear that people will view us as not being "humble".  When we walk out our call to Christ in boldness and humility, intentionally keeping our eyes focused on the Lord and our paths straight, we will impact our lives and the lives of others... and it is only fair that God receives the glory that He deserves for the life He has brought you into.

Summary:

So... my response...

If you revealing your fast brings God glory, use discernment and share about it if it is appropriate.

If you are not sharing about your fast for a false sense of "humility", reconsider who your focus is on, because it is likely that your are putting yourself and your public "christian" image before God.

If you are sharing about your fast for selfish reasons.. Congratulations!  You just figured out something more to struggle through during you fast, and it is very likely that if you surrender your pride, God will fill you with humility and boldness over time.

Peace,

dragon's milk and crude stereotypes

  
Story:

I was at The Happy Gnome last night... which is one of my favorite places in Saint Paul to enjoy good company and great beer.

While I was enjoying the evening with a couple of my buds we noticed that there was a bit of commotion at the bar.  Apparently the bartender had left a tap running and had to leave the bar for some unknown reason.

So there it sat...  A glass beginning to overflow with an adequately delicious stout called Dragon's Milk.  At first the dark liquid began spilling over the side of the glass and forming a pool at it's base.  The tap was only slightly open which added a dramatic note to this entire experience.  The pool began to swell as the light from the bar shimmered against the darkness of the beer and becamed framed by the deep burgundy wood of the bar.  It was both beautiful and tragic as the darkness began to cascade from the bar and spilled onto the floor.

As this took place, a number of observers began lamenting the tragic waste and felt helpless in their ability to intervene.  Patrons began squirming in their seats as agony and confusion began seeping in... until one man made the move.  A savior began his bold journey to a place where he did not belong, but does respect greatly.  As this man found himself behind the bar at The Happy Gnome he reached out and with one precisely coordinated gesture he caused the cascade of stout to recede. When my buddy made his way back to our booth, he was admired by all those who had witnessed the tragedy of the overflow and the heroic efforts of the one who would put an end to that tragedy.

The bartender, having seen the final moments of this heroic feat, even bought a drink for this man of greatness, and the night continued on as we sat together, enjoying good company and great beer.

Application:

Too often we remain merely the spectators... fully capable of making a difference but lacking the willingness to do so.  Arguably, those who pride themselves with the greatest moral values should also be the ones leading the way in physical acts of compassion, equality, and redemption.. yet, too often this is not the case.  We seem to either point out the problems and remain seated or ignore the problems because we are too focused on ourselves or those within our immediate circle.  Sadly, the large amount of cultural segregation between christian and unchristian often implies that those within the immediate circle of christian influence are christian.  We have become a very comfortable, incestuous, and self-centered product, for a movement based on a mandate to go and make disciples of all nations.

Here are some categories christians can fall into.

the ignorant christian:  Unaware of their surroundings, the ignorant christian has not been exposed to the needs that exist in the world.  They may be physically, mentally, or emotionally removed from such startling realities, but the fact remains they are ignorant to them.  Their lack of knowledge is likely do to a poor job of shepherding by their spiritual leader... these people are not necessarily in fault, for they know no better.. but if they do become aware of their call to follow Christ.. they can no longer claim ignorance as their guard.

the complacent christian: Unlike the ignorant christian, the complacent christian has become aware of the responsibilities included in following Christ.  They are now responsible to obey their mandate to administer love in tangible ways and to bring the truth of Christ to those who are still unchristian.  It is also quite likely they have become aware of the injustice that exists in this world.  The complacent christian chooses to not respond to these needs though.  Possibly because they feel overwhelmed, possibly because it is not a part of the christian sub-culture, possibly because they are not being shepherded in it.. regardless... they are aware and uninvolved.. they are responsible to act, and lack of their lack of action could be classify them as guilty of refusing their call.

the responsible christian: There is a thin line between the complacent christian and the responsible christian.  The responsible christian is the same as the complacent christian insofar as they are aware of their call to respond to the needs of the world and to be salt and light in the midst of a hurt and dying world.  The difference is that the responsible christian will provide lip service to the needs in the world and become an advocate for action.  They will speak of the importance of being outreached focused and even be able to tell you about the latest cool justice oriented ministry featured in Relevant Magazine. They have seen "Invisible Children" 8 times, and thought "Call and Response" was way cool and insightful.  They will voice their frustrations with the church and it's lack of movement... of which they are equally responsible.  You see, the responsible christian has taken on the guilt of the broken world and manifested it into a voice.. but nothing more than a voice.  They feel responsible, and to speak up is how their guilt is relieved.. they will still not take any physical steps forward in actually pursuing a lifestyle of justice and compassion, as that would inconvenience them.  They will claim that "outreach" is a specific gift... when in actuality it is the call of anyone who would claim to follow Christ.  They are responsible not because of their actions but because they feel responsible to do something.. and while that does raise awareness.. it only provides lip service and never moves beyond that to action.


the Christ following christian: Like the responsible christian, the Christ following christian is aware of the call of Jesus and the darkness in the world.  They are also advocates for taking action and are likely well connected with the same NGO's that the responsible christian is.  Unlike the responsible christian, the majority of raised awarenss comes not from the Christ followers words, but from their lifetstyles and their actions.  They are intentionally living out the call of Christ and have decided to follow the footsteps of the one the claim as Lord of their lives and the hope of their salvation.  They worship God with their actions and because of this they are willing to sacrifice for the cause of Christ.  "Outreach" might not even be a word in their vocabulary, for there is no clear distinction between when the are intentionally piercing into the heart of darkness and when they are living life.  They will still share about the importance of intentionally loving the broken and lost and displaying compassion while pursuing justice, but it is a natural result of the life they have decided to live and the God they have decided to serve.  The Christ following christian is arguably, but likely, the rarest of the four crude stereotypes, but these are the ones that are demonstrating a physical example of what it looks like to follow Christ.

There might be other categories, but I think this pretty well sums things up.

We need more people willing to take action, and most of us won't even work up the boldness to shut off a tap.

duck, duck, gray duck: V2.0 - 3 sites reviewed

I don't normally do this, but thanks to an insightful reader I decided to rewrite this entry to clarify my initial reason for posting it. So, this is Version 2.0.

DUCK

I recently had a conversation with some friends of mine.

During this conversation a particular website was brought up.. at which point I shook my head, covered my face, and laughed due to mild disbelief and shock.

I had completely forgotten about this site and have not visited this site in a long time, but apparently it still exists.

The basic concept of the site is to ensure that sheltered christians remain as innocent as doves while being as "plugged in" as a fetus.  If you didn't catch it, I just referenced the website.... "Plugged In Online" created by "Focus on the Family""

Their mission statement is summarized as "shining a light on the world of popular entertainment"

for simplicity's sake, I will focus on the movie review portion of their site.

PROS

This site is meant to review media and it's content, allowing for people to be aware of what you might be viewing should you see a particular movie.  The site will typically begin with a quick synopsis of the movie and then move into a content description with categories such as; "Positive elements, spiritual content, sexual content, violent content, crude or profane language, and drug and alcohol content"  The review will typically end with the critics overall opinion of the film.

CONS
 
Nearly every movie review over a "G" rating can be summarized the same way... something like this,

"Would have been and amazing movie if it didn't have that worldly influence... what a shame... what a dirty, dirty shame... skip this one"

Ok, maybe that's not entirely accurate...some of the "G" rated movies are reviewed this way too. (that was a joke... take it easy)

Really though, this is what I think are the negative aspects of this online tool.  I am not opposed to having movie and music reviews done from a christian perspective and there is some great potential in this whole thing... the problem comes when it perpetuates the ever increasing physical and cultural separation between those who follow Christ, and those who don't.  Though christians have been called to a different standard of living we have also been engage with those outsideof the walls of the church... even if it means we hear a swear word or two.

This website seems to focus on a specific demographic, I might be wrong but it is probably used mainly by conservative christians, or conservative christians with children they would like to protect and likely have a fear of engaging with "the world".

 I am not super conservative and I don't have children, so I might perceive this site differently than it's intended audience... but, this is what i see as a potential shortcoming of the site...

We live in a story-telling culture.  One of the main ways that we now tell stories is through media... whether books, music, or film... it is now how we express our beliefs and values as a people. If what this tool does is mainly keep people from hearing others stories because their content causes fear, than I argue that we are disengaging from hearing the stories of the very people, as christians, we have been called to connect with.


 DUCK

 If you like YouTube but fear sinners, then you'll love...

GodTube

PROS

free online videos intended to offer a positive message.

CONS 

I see this site as the "testamints" of the internet.

It is nearly a comical parody of YouTube , and I am not sure it is necesary to slap a "jesus fish" on an already existing website.  Many, if not all of the videos presented on GodTube are also available on YouTube.  It disengages from the culture at large...   A bright light doesn't make much of an impact in an illuminated room but watch what happens in the midst of darkness, in the same way, I think a better use of the time and energy of people who care about GodTube would be to focus their energy in the YouTube world and share their videos and opinions there.  One of the YouTube features that draws attention and and allows for dialogue is the "comments" section, and I think that would be a better place to respectfully share opinions.

Pretty self explanatory, but once again... an example of what I think is an unnecessary segregation between the christian sub-culture and the culture it is supposed to be influencing.


GRAY DUCK

 Our third example looks a little different than the last two.

Musician Derek Webb is the founder of an online music site called noisetrade.

It is a revolutionary tool where fans can listen to and download good music for free... legally.

PROS

Although Derek is a Christian, the website is not limited to only christian artists!  Oh my!  Instead, it is a venue where artists are able to get their name and music spread to people who appreciate it and will likely support and promote them in the future.  It used to allow you to choose either telling 5 friends about the artist or paying what you want, but recently changed to download for free or pay what you'd like as a tip.

A christian artist founded a website that is beneficial to the music community while at the same time progressive.. and it does not go against christian values.  weird.

CONS

There are not enough christian influenced sites like this...



This is something I would like to see more of.  It is an example of christians providing a new way of doing things.. using our creativity and gifts to benefit others, being leaders in the arts and using our passions to show a different way.  I think that we have for too long limited ourselves to the DUCK approach... which is basically doing the same things as everyone else, just not as good and in a sheltered environment.  we need more GRAY DUCK ways of thinking... where we look different but it is good because we are the ones moving ahead and making a difference.

So, I recommend that you check all three of these sites out, I am admittedly quite critical, and there are probably some good things about all three if you are looking to find them.... but still i look forward to the time where there are more GRAY DUCKS out there... know of any others?

I know my initial review of the sites was pretty harsh, if you had the chance to read them, and some of it was intentionally over the top, and I am not trying to bash christians for standing up in their beliefs. 

I am trying to get the candles out of the fully illuminated rooms and into the darkness where they make a difference, and trying to encourage the salt to come out of the ocean. The more that talented christians use their gifts in the larger society, which is a culture consisting of an unchristian majority,  the more potential there is to have a positive influence and to actually shine lights in dark places. The first two sites, while very similar to other online sites, are an example of a christian site that is hoping to reach a majority christian audience... this in and of itself is not a bad thing.. It becomes a bad thing when the majority of sites by christians are aimed at christians, which is what has in fact happened... even my blog, momentum, falls into this category. The third site is aimed at a larger majority but still has christian influence and in the long run has a greater potential to reach people who are not proclaimed christians. This is what I think we need more of if we are to be effective in ministry.