prayer shawls and sex toys

I just had an interesting scenario placed in my mind...

A friend of mine was telling me about a dilemma that has come into existence at her husband's congregation.  As it turns out,  there is a small group of women from a small church in Minnesota that meet together to make small talk and prayer shawls.  The majority of these women are rather conservative in their views and are also in the later years of their lives, although there are a few who are younger in age (in their thirties) or newer to the christian sub-culture.

(disclaimer: I have never been invited to a prayer shawl meeting and am only speculating on what it might have been like to be in this setting. I apologize in advance for any misinformation that might be presented in my attempt to describe such a gathering)

My initial thoughts when it comes to "prayer shawl meeting" are of tea and some sort of phyiscal representation of the word "pleasant"  so... here we go...

As the prayer shawl meeting began and the nice christian women made themselves comfortable while possibly enjoying some type of warm beverage, they likely began thinking of pleasant things to discuss or readied themselves to listen to other delightful pieces of information that the other nice ladies in the room were going to share.  The meeting was going splendidly as Gertrude mentioned the nice tea cookies that Lilith had made.  Conversation and prayer shawling eventually lead to a fun discussion of pleasant and nice current events.

when all of this was interrupted unexpectedly....

...and by something that was so foreign and perceived as un-pleasant.

You see, one of the young women who was newer to the group had been trying to come up with a way of making extra income to provide some more financial stability for her family. Her pursuit had lead her to a solution.

sex toys.

She could sell sex toys the same way that some people sell can-cutting knives or plastic storage containers that burp.

I imagine that there was quite a change in atmosphere after this foreign concept entered the room and "dirtied" the ears of the pleasant christian ladies...

Anyhow, the meeting eventually carried on and ended.  Later that night the husband of the prayer shawl gathering leader ended up hearing about the "incident" and calling the head pastor, asking if he could meet for breakfast the following morning.  Breakfast was had, a story was told, a story was retold, and now that story is being written...

This leaves the pastor in a predicament that he will have to, through discernment, sort out...

On the one hand, he does not want to offend or drive away the shawl ladies who were so thrown off by the "incident".. on the other hand, he does not want to offend or drive away the young lady who brought up her entrepreneurial endeavor... and his view is that the topic in and of itself is not necessarily a black and white one.

Anyhow, I am glad it isn't me that has to sort through this mess....   there are some lessons I learn about it though.

Sex toys and prayer shawls aside, one aspect of what we have here is a cross-cultural misunderstanding.

On one side, we have a group of christians with a very conservative mindset who have likely been a part of this church subculture for many.. many.. many years.

On one side, we have the newer christian who is not as familiar with the cultural norms of the older ladies, and also likely has a different perspective on sex and what is culturally appropriate to discuss in a prayer shawl gathering.

Neither group was prepared to handle the situation that they found themselves in...

One side was unprepared to discuss something that was out of their comfort zone, and the other side was unaware that such a topic would be seen as out of place or offensive to the other side.

I think that this is seen in a much inflated degree and has bigger implications as it reaches different spheres of cultures and subcultures.

I think it boils down to this...

The more willing we are to communicate on cultural and social issues in ways that are clear and respectful, the less we will be startled by a cultural curve-ball in an otherwise t-ball focused sub-culture.

I think many christians are prepared to regurgitate answers to common questions within the church... it is like t-ball... you know where the ball is, it isn't going to move, it isn't going to change, all you have to do is hit it and that is good enough.. you don't even need to hit it hard.. just, bump it forward...

.. but then all of a sudden some kid shows up who doesn't play t-ball and throws a fast ball, or a curve ball, or a knuckle puck, or a toaster.... and if we would have done our research, we would have known how to handle these things coming at us.. but all along we were way too focused on just playing t-ball... the fact is that culture will continue to change and develop.

It is the job of the church to continue to look at the culture around it and communicate the Gospel through words and actions in a ways that can be understood... let's face it... we now live in a world of prayer shawls and sex toys and if we don't start paying attention we are going to get blasted in the face by a toaster.


Peace.